Pooma was in her bed. It was nearly 6 AM. Boston was awake and live. And she was into her laptop blogging on Tumblr. It was her favorite site for blogging. Pooma had been in a relationship for three years. She used to be a happy soul. She was the sunshine of her family. But now Pooma was nothing but a statue of gloom and sadness. One can merely see her smiling.
Anish and Pooma joined SAT courses just after they completed their intermediate. That’s when they met each other. It was a fateful meeting like in the movies. “Leap Education Institute”, Anish and Pooma read at the same time. Pooma giggled. They looked at each other at same time and smiled at each other.
“Hi! I’m Anish.”
“I’m Pooma.” She was little embarrassed.
Pooma, a girl with fair complexion and big eyes with a smile so good that anyone would fall for her in seconds. A total charm and charisma she had in her that would make anyone spell bounded in her thoughts. She was an art that was bizarre and incarnate, a splendor born in heaven, poesy whose verses were unfathomable; she was the rain that bond soul of the blue and the earth. Kindness sparkles through her. She was the aroma of love; she was love herself that the creator had ever bestowed upon this world.
Anish was a boy every girl dream of. Tall, tough, audacious and good-looking, he had some kind of magic in him like an illusionist.
It had been a week since the first meeting, the second fateful meeting happened in a restaurant near the institute.
“Hey there Pooma, Hi!”, Anish Smiled.
“Hi Anish”, Pooma waived him.
“So how’s your preparation?”, she asked.
“Going well “, he replied.
Anish came near her. “You already finished”, he asked.
“Yeah”, she smiled.
She was trying to pull out a napery but it was all coming out.
“Here you go”, Anish pulled out a napery for her.
“Ok Anish well good luck with this food”, she smiled.
“Hey leave the bills for me, for our meeting”, he smiled.
“No No, it’s ok.”, she said.
But he insisted and she left her bills. “Bye, see you next time”, Pooma went out of the restaurant.
After this meeting, they used to meet every day in that that restaurant. And a spark was beginning to take its place in Pooma’s heart slowly. She was burning from inside. She was impatient and restless. She was in Love or something that never happened to her. She didn’t figure out what actually was her problem. She just kept on burning and burning. She phoned him every day. They used to meet. She was always planning something and all that had something to do with Anish. They expressed their feelings for each other and they were in relationship.
The heart is the only thing in this universe that is not programmed or you can say that doesn’t go well with rules and restrictions. It is something far beyond imagination. No one knows when and where what this heart will do and why.
Pooma now dreams herself as Cinderella and Anish as her prince. He was in her thoughts all day. She used to talk all night with him on phone and chat with him in social sites. Love had taken its roots deep down inside her heart or her soul now was subverted.
Love, a feeling that was never clear to humankind, which was always in mist, is something no one could ever imagine. It takes its form still lacks shape. It has the limit still no one is contented.
Pooma got her visa and so did Anish. They had been lucky for each other. It had been a year she was in love with Anish. She was tumbling deep and deep into him. She was always excited for him. She was building myriad spindles inside her that made her love towards him stronger and stronger.
Pooma started living in Boston with her relatives and Anish was in California. They used to meet online in Skype. But their visits became less frequent than they were in Nepal. Still Love was knitting a castle of dream for Pooma. She used to call him every day. But sometimes she used to be disappointed at times when Anish didn’t pick up her call or he didn’t reply her call or messages. They used to date once in a month.
Time was her enemy. After more than two years of her love and relationship, she was finding something different with Anish. He was not as he used to be. Still, her love was swelling.
Pooma started blogging on Tumblr. She usually used to blog about love. She loved reading noble and love stories. She used to talk about happiness, the light that love diffuse in one’s world and make it beautiful.
Despair and pain have been a subset of time, and happiness is never eternal. Love stories are made and epics are written, all out of small fragments of moments glued together, like a mirror. But when a mirror shatters into pieces while we are looking us in it, there’s no story, only remains are the pieces and ineradicable bruises inside us that crush us every day and the pain after that is inevitable.
After more than two years of their relationship, Pooma was entirely drowned in love with Anish. It was May 25th, she had a date. Anish had called her last night. It had been a month since she last met Anish. She was excited as always. She got herself into the best dress. She was looking elegant.
They met in a restaurant. Anish looked somewhat disturbed. He was feeling uneasy and Pooma could feel him.
“What’s the matter with you?”
“Anish”, she asked.
“Is anything disturbing you? Tell me Anish. Tell me, if I can be of any help”, she was worried.
“Pooma”, Anish was shuddering. His voice was weak.
“Pooma, are you in love with me?”
“Of course you are. But look, I mean, it’s just that, I am talking about…”, Anish was afraid.
“What are you saying Anish, I couldn’t understand your psychobabble”, Pooma muttered as tears were rolling out of her eyes. She looked broken and deserted. Like the shock wave destroys everything Anish destroyed her. She was frozen for the moment.
“I love you and that’s all I know”, Pooma cried out loud.
She had never cried out this loud. She was feeling something heavy as if the gravity of the situation is crushing her, interring her deep into darkness. She was feeling dizzy.
“I want to end this relationship. I know you love me and I loved you too but this relationship is choking me. I want to be free.” Anish spoke out loud.
“Go away”, Blubbered Pooma. She was looking at the wall and the clock. It was May 25th, the day they met for the first time and the day they broke out. Tears were rolling out of her eyes. She was trying to be strong but the situation was making her worse.
Anish paid the bill and went off but Pooma was still there. She didn’t try to figure out why because love never chokes, the love she knew stands strong beyond every problem. And for her, Anish was weak, who couldn’t even share his part of the pain, who never understood his beloved. She was smashed and her soul was the unhappy ‘unhappy soul’, that resides between the cold walls of the castle of her dream, half knitted, that looked more like a dungeon .
Love is factual, it is not emotional, something to be cried upon or over, it is not a sentiment. Love has no sentimentality about it at all. Love is to give completely your soul, mind, your heart, your whole being and not ask a thing in return. And she did her part, she loved him. Still, she couldn’t hate him because you can’t hate the one you love. Love and hate never exist together.
But Pooma was engulfed in a gloom, she was hopeless, sad and the only one thing remained with her, her blog. It was where she told the story of her agony.
The relationship is not forever but love is. Pain exists in a relationship but not in love. Relationship and love are two different things and the one who understands them well never stops shining. They are always happy forever like in fairy tales.